It’s been the strangest of Decembers for me. I’ve been quiet – that alone is a clue to my conundrum – and have been trying to process the grief I’m feeling for the loss of my dear friend of 40 f’ing years. Lynda, Lynda, Lynda…. from Ohio, born the same year, loved the same music and had cultural touchstones to share.  

I didn’t know if I’d post this as it’s personal, but I know her friends and mine want to read it. I hope it helps us all realize the wonderful woman we lost this year. 

This photo is from our Hearst Castle trip – Lynda was a Leo so any photo opps with a lion were always good.

Let me set the scene. It’s a beautiful home in West Hills, L.A. with striking views of the mountains. Home of the Bookbinder’s. Maybe 25 people were there, I was kinda in another space. My son along with my sister Cathy and her husband Tom, who all knew Lynda, came to the celebration of life. It was good to have their company. Lynda passed away on Dec. 11 so having the gathering so soon after and on my birthday was tough to muster, however, I did. The Lester sisters asked me to do the eulogy. Said I would be the best person to do it. Honored. Gawd, I hate deadlines. Thanks to my friend Rick Carter for suggesting to write about the good times we had, that allowed me to tell our stories, and I love to tell stories. It was my honor to share the great friendship we had. I’m going to miss her like crazy. 

Eulogy Begins Here:

Even though most people call me by my nickname Mo, for Lynda, she always called me Maureen.  She was my BFF, my confidante and my counsel. She was someone I could confide in about my work, knowing she would keep my secrets, while giving me advice on how to move through it.

Forty years is a long time to remain close friends and remarkably, we did.  Her stalwart friendship was the source of great strength for me. Life is hard and we need help from our friends to muddle through it. She was a great friend. The best.  

Often times people would ask when we were traveling if we were sisters… we’d smile and say no…then give each other that knowing look, it was as if our souls found each other, we ventured to guess we’d been through past lives together. We could talk about anything; no subject was taboo. We were destined to have found each other.  

We shared so many fun experiences along the way.  I’ll reveal a few and maybe they’ll stir the memories you have with her and hope you can share yours with us.  

Lynda and I met at The Hollywood Reporter in 1983. I was laser focused on getting a job at the Reporter when I finally landed in LA.  My first job I was executive secretary for the ad department half the day, the other half to a whacky social columnist George Christy.  I always connected with the secretaries in offices where I worked since that’s how things got done back then.  Lynda was executive secretary to the publisher Tichi Wilkerson Kassel. When she got hired, I went up and introduced myself.  Executive suites were on the second floor. 

The Reporter was on Sunset Blvd. between Highland and Vine. The building had originally been a men’s haberdashery store with a revolving door for the entrance, which was an endless source of comical references to the number of people who worked there over the years. It needed a revolving door! 

This adapted office space had beautiful dark wood cabinets all around the walls of the first floor. The closets dividing editorial from advertising held the Telex machine, and teletypes for AP, UPI and City News Service.  Someone had to keep an eye on the news service machines in case they ran out of paper, or a breaking story came across. I mastered the machines and that was how I leapt from advertising into editorial and never looked back.  

Lynda with her kitty Romy.

As Lynda and I got to know one another over those early years, we discovered we had a lot in common.  The Catholic school background…our status as ‘lapsed Catholics’…a shared SOH…we both loved our pets…had really similar taste in music… and were born the same year – 1951. Plus, being from the other side of the country – we were grateful to be out of cold winters and humid summers.  Destined. 

In 1984, we went to the LA Olympics to see Greg Louganis, the handsome diver to marvel at his beautiful physique and witness his gold medal 10-meter platform dives. As Lynda would say, Hubba-hubba. 

In ’89 I was separating from Eli’s dad, and we moved in with my mom. She loved coming up to SB for many things, but really enjoyed getting to know my mom. She called her ‘Bachy’ like all the grandkids. Seeing them connect was so special – they were both avid readers.  She met a lot of my friends, like the bartender at Jimmy’s Oriental Gardens who was from Ohio and she attended more than a few of my birthday bashes. I wanted her to feel at home in SB.  She came up to parties, BBQs and dinners at my sister’s house.  She loved being here.

I didn’t even talk about the 2010 Rose Parade we all went to – that’s Steve Bookbinder with Lynda and Peggy Lester is hidden behind him… what a fun day that was! 

Lynda was always thinking about me. Since I was a single mom, she decided to step in and took Eli shopping for my birthday and Christmas.  I still cherish a big vase he picked out for me.  Another opportunity came up to do a family vacation so she & I and Eli along with Pat & Ronnie went up the CA coast to Monterey Bay and the Aquarium. Last stop at Avila Beach Spa to enjoy the hot tubs, the pool and adult beverages.  This is where Lynda taught Eli the basics of swimming. He recalled how patient she was with him in the pool and another time, listening to him ramble on about Pokemon – not knowing much about it, but she listened.  She was a good listener.  

Here is Lynda at work, producing from 2005. I see the Santa Barbara Int’l FF which I did the PR for from 1999 – 2006. She loved coming up for the film festival. Note the Aleve and the Altoids on the desk.

Cambria was our favorite place to get away from it all.  (Cambria, rhymes with ‘Ham’bria).  Locals could tell you were from out of town when you called it Came-Bria!  We learned that at a community show the locals did (we took note, ham/cam). We watched the small-town parades for Memorial Day and July 4^th.  Did an Open Studios Tour and which got us into some very cool houses.  We took in three tours of Hearst Castle on one visit.  It was a gift from a client I had in SB that was also a State Park.  We did the Cottages & Kitchen Tour, (did someone say kitchen tour? she was there), the Upstairs Suites Tour and an Evening Tour, where docents dressed up in the fashions of the 1930s, as we strolled around them with fake cocktails – god forbid any liquid should drop in the castle.  

It was such a great pleasure to share the things I could add to our trips.  See, Lynda did the advance planning and found the VRBO places we stayed. I enjoyed some amazing meals at her talented hands.  I did the driving, took photos, and was comic relief.  She took me up a month or two after Bachy passed, and OMG it stormed like crazy – rattling the fence out back and keeping us inside for that trip.  Her thoughtfulness was legendary.  

Wine Tastings were always on the agenda when we went up to Cambria as was a visit to The Black Cat restaurant, olallieberry pies, the wee-small town of Harmony, and the Piedras Blancas Northern Elephant Seal rookery. There were always ground squirrels looking for hand-outs there and I was an easy mark. Lynda would often find me talking to the animals… and roll her eyes and laugh.  

2017 Lynda’s birthday trip to Cambria, flashing the peace sign as always!

She got tickets for us to see Tom Jones in Vegas.  He is not someone I would ordinarily go to see, and she knew that, but we loved to share our favorite things with each other.  Plus, I had a friend who lived in Vegas and we could stay with her, saving us hotel costs.  Boom!  I suggested that since women were known to throw underpants at him, I would have to bring some. She winced. When we got to Vegas, I asked my friend where I could score some fresh new panties, and we were off to this large sprawling place with hundreds of booths.  I found a corner booth with underwear and told the vendor what I was looking for – aerodynamic panties.  They need to fly 15 – 20 feet I said. He shrugged and walked away.  As I moved over to the thongs pile, I turned around to show her I’d found the right ones, and she was gone.  She’d moved away from the booth; afraid she’d be spotted with the panty-flinging woman.  At the casino for the show, I had three pair of panties in my purse and I offered her first choice. Again, she declined, unbelievable! so I went bouncing up to the side of the stage and pulled back on the thong and let ‘er rip. Three times. Coming back to the table looking like the cat that ate the canary, she just shook her head and said I was hopeless.  I reminded her, that’s why she loved me.  

In Cambria at The Black Cat enjoying our Beckmen Rose before dinner. 

She was a key ingredient in a special surprise I was planning for my HS theatre pal Jamie Duffy.  I knew June Foray; the voice of Rocky the Flying Squirrel (along with thousands of other voices) and Duffy did a great Bullwinkle. We all LOVED that show! I wanted to put them together. June’s sister Geri and her husband Sam drove June over to the Lester-Marks Topanga campus and the rest is history. We had a blast. Eating, drinking, laughing and telling stories. 

One visit to SB, I was taking her and my pal Rex to see a great musical show about Buddy Holly at SBCC. We went out for drinks and knosh afterwards, and the waitresses’ name was ….Pepper. Uh-oh, we all thought of the Angie Dickenson TV show ‘Police Woman’ at the same time (her character’s name was Pepper…) and without missing a beat, we all said PEPPER! together at the top of our lungs no less. This young woman had no idea who Angie Dickenson was but sure got a kick out of us laughing at our silliness.  Ever since, now and then, I’d arbitrarily say ‘Pepper!’ and we’d both crack up.  

Our best vacation was to Hawai’i in 2007 where we visited Maui and Oahu. This time I had friends from SB who had places on those islands so I was able to get us two places to stay for free and the friend who worked at the Hotel Hana Maui, he got us the staff rate for overnight in a cottage. She would say ‘Maureen always runs into someone she knows wherever we go’ and as we were driving around Hana, sure enough, I saw an actor I knew from SB pushing a stroller. I went past him and then realized who it was, put the car in reverse and chatted like we were in SB.  She often said to friends in conversation, “Maureen’s never met a stranger.”  I heard one of her sisters make the same remark about her. We were such great traveling partners. We were deeply committed to each other as friends for life. We saw some strikingly beautiful sunsets there. I’ll never forget that trip and I’ll never forget Lynda.   I’ll always think of her when I see a great sunset.  

Farewell my friend – I’ll see you on the other side and we can pick up where we left off. 

August 2020, our last visit to Cambria. Her she is in my kitchen with Macy. Flashing the you know what.